Now, Beau. Regarding the issue of security. It's a topic we're all concerned about. What can you tell the American people about your commitment to keeping them safe?
I have a great belief in keeping ones enemies contained, Thom. Really, it's as simple as that. I'm not going to go prodding ants nests just for the fun of it, let me tell you. And birds pretty much stick to themselves, though they can be incredibly infuriating when they think you can't get at them through the glass. I try to keep my head about me, though.
Now, mice. They can be a real problem. That's where I have every other candidate in the field beat, paws down. If a mouse walked up to Tash, I'm sure she would invite it to tea! All kinds of backroom politics like that -- next thing you know she'll be consorting with rats. Mingo beat me up once when I had caught a mouse -- knocked me down and took my mouse (it was still alive, of course). He paraded around like he had caught it, then the oaf lost his grip and it got away. Utter incompetence.
Yes, I see. So, no need to fear on the mouse, bird, or spider front, is that it?
Rest assured, Thom, you will be safe on my watch.
I feel safe.
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